WEEKEND: Sexualization of Our Girls (10-30-2010)

HALF-HOUR PODCAST SUMMARY:

Things have changed since we were kids. And these days, girls are exposed to sexuality younger than ever. Mark Gregston discusses some of the reasons that our daughters give in to a sexually charged culture, and helps parents respond appropriately in light of this sensitive trend.

LEARN ABOUT OUR NEXT FAMILIES IN CRISIS RETREAT, DECEMBER 2-4 (go to www.familycrisisconference.com)

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TURBULENCE AHEAD WESTERN TOUR
DENVER, CO – NOV. 13   GERING, NE — NOV. 14
Learn more at www.turbulenceahead.org.

Conflict Is Not Always Rebellion (10-29-2010)

PODCAST SCRIPT:

If you equate conflict and disagreements with rebellion, you may not be allowing your teen to learn the value of standing up for what they believe.

Disagreements with your teen are a part of the maturing process. If you attempt to control or dominate every heated discussion, they’ll stop listening, just like you aren’t listening to them.  A better approach is to use times of conflict as an opportunity to honor your teen’s independent thinking.

How you communicate during times of conflict teaches  important principles to your teen, including: it’s okay to not agree with everyone, to stand up and fight for what we believe, and just as important, that even in conflict we can still remain friends.

Personal Boundaries (10-28-2010)

PODCAST SCRIPT:

Teens who haven’t learned to respect personal boundaries can fail to realize that their parents are human beings who need their own space.

Naturally selfish teens can step over the line by putting more and more demands on their parents’ time, money and patience. Some parents may even feel walked on or that their life is no longer their own; rather, it belongs to the care and feeding of their teenager’s selfishness.

So, reestablish your need for personal space and privacy once your child reaches the teen years. It will help your teen know that you are still a person who they’ll need to ask for help if they want it, but they shouldn’t automatically expect it.

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Our next Families in Crisis Conference is coming up  December 2-4.  See www.familycrisisconference.com.

Undermining God’s Love (10-27-2010)

PODCAST SCRIPT:

Scripture tells us that God is like the mighty warrior, but He is also the tender loving mother who plays with her child.

Unfortunately, Christian parents can sometimes undermine God’s love by finder-pointing and messages of guilt and shame. A teen can begin feeling as though there is no way to please their parents, or God. But that’s not true Christianity. Jesus said, “Come to me, you are weary and heavy laden.”

If you have been overly strict, try this. Focus on teaching and discipline three days a week. On the other days major on making your teen feel appreciated and valued. You’ll soon learn that when your teen feels valued, he’ll be less likely to get in trouble.

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TURBULENCE AHEAD WESTERN TOUR WITH MARK GREGSTON (more at www.turbulenceahead.org)

• DENVER, CO — Nov 13
• GERING, NE — Nov. 14

A Ton of Stuff (10-26-2010)

PODCAST SCRIPT:

We parents do a ton of stuff for our kids, but what if they still don’t feel valued? Do we do more?

There are four things you can offer your teenager to make them feel valued: your unconditional love, your experience, your time, and your wisdom; each of these builds value.

You’ll notice that I didn’t mention “your money” or “your faith”? Material and spiritual things are needed and valuable, but they won’t build the kind of value and identity that a parent’s attention and love can.

In fact, a teenager’s desire to be valued is so intense; they’ll dump their faith and destroy everything in their life just to find it — and usually from the wrong crowd.

Stumbling Lessons (10-25-2010)

PODCAST SCRIPT:

When your teen stumbles, do you support him or make him feel like a heel?

There’s no question that your teen will make mistakes. That goes with the territory. But it is in those times that a parent can either strengthen the relationship or tear it down. They can either help the teen learn a lesson, or they can set the teen up to make the same mistake again and again.

When your teenager stumbles, move toward him with a heart filled with compassion. Avoid embarrassing him for his failings. Let him know that you will always love him, and allow consequences bring to home the lesson, all the while showing sadness for his need to experience correction.

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CLICK HERE to learn about our next Family Crisis Conference, December 2-4.

WEEKEND: Over-Controlling Parents (10-23-2010)

HALF-HOUR PODCAST SUMMARY:

Your kids are growing up! And as teens struggle toward independence, it can be a little scary handing over responsibility to them. Mark coaches parents through the different stages of child-rearing and gives practical advice for overcoming the dangerous temptation to become over-controlling parents.

Offer Your Teen a Way Out (10-22-2010)

PODCAST SCRIPT:

Parents need to offer their teenager a safe way out of bad situations.

You warn your teenagers about life’s dangers, but when they don’t listen, have you given them a parachute to safely exit the situation?

For instance, if your daughter is in a potentially compromising situation with a boy, have her call you, no matter what hour, to be picked up, before it goes too far.

Or, if your son has been drinking, tell him you’ll come get him wherever he is, versus driving home drunk. In both cases, promise to do so with no lecture and no questions asked.

When teens have a parachute, they’ll be more likely to exit a bad situation before it gets worse.

Any Offensive Way In Me (10-21-2010)

PODCAST SCRIPT:

In scripture, David said “Search me, O God, and know my heart….see if there is any offensive way in me.” As a parent, are you in the habit of being offensive to your teenager?

It can be hard not to respond harshly when your teen makes poor choices, but have you offended or hurt her without even knowing it? It’s easy to do, so find out! Give her the freedom to be completely honest with you when anything you say makes her feel bad.

If you’ve already said hurtful things, apologize and tell her that you are trying to be a better person. Like David, you’re working hard to learn if there is any offensive way in you.

Family Saved From Crumbling (10-20-2010)

PODCAST SCRIPT:

Many parents today are sinking in miry situations that they never saw coming with their teenager. That’s why they need your help.

You and your family can be a lifeline to the families in your church, at work or in your neighborhood. When you see parents struggling with their teenager, reach out to them.

Problems with teenagers can mushroom into problems in the marriage, and even lead to the breakdown of the family. So, instead of thinking things like, “Why can’t they get that child under control?”, or “They must be bad parents”, be proactive in reaching out with cold cups of water. Your helpful concern and friendship could be what saves their family from crumbling apart.