Parenting Teens This Week

The Adopted Teen’s Quest for Identity

Adoption is obviously a better alternative to a child languishing “in the system” – living in foster care or an orphanage. That’s why I have worked many years with national and international adoption organizations whose goal is to match needy kids with great parents. As I’ve experienced these adoptions first hand, I firmly believe that God has His hand in every case. After all, God is the ultimate authority on adoption. I think He provides specific parents with specific children for specific reasons. It may be hard to believe, but God may have given you a child knowing that as a teen they would struggle, and that He would need you for such a time as this. >> Article continued…

Letting Go of the Rope

I recently looked at some old photos of myself and was shocked to realize that I was wearing the same shirts today that I wore 20 years ago.  I was so used to wearing them that I never took time to notice the nicer, newer shirts left for me in my closet as a gracious hint from my wife. I have the same problem with my shirts that many parents have with their old parenting techniques.  There is nothing wrong with their tactics for kids in their younger years, but they are just a little outdated for teenagers.

If your son or daughter is responding negatively to some of your well-intended discipline, and your attempts to rein in their behavior is not working, don’t automatically assume that what you’re doing is all wrong.  It’s just that your teen is changing at such an alarming rate that some of the established ways of doing things are no longer giving you the positive results they once were. >> Article continued…

Parenting Shift in the Teen Years

Do you know what needs to change about your parenting as your child approaches the teen years? So far, everything may be going like clockwork, so why change? What’s been working for more than a decade will surely continue working right up until the day your child leaves home, right?

Well, not always.  Some parents are caught off guard, baffled and confused when their teenager begins to turn their back on the family and all the values they hold dear. They thought they had done everything right, but for some reason, their teenager is spinning out of control.

So, how can this be avoided? What is it about your parenting that should change when your children reach the teen years?  Let me give you some suggestions… >> Article continued…

Possibly the Greatest Teen Parenting Mistake

Well-intentioned parents, doing as they have always done to protect their children when they were young, often circle the wagons and marshal control when their teenager makes a mistake in judgment. Others keep their wagons circled all the time, never giving up any control to the teenager in the first place. Such parents then wonder why their teenager rebels against them or lacks maturity. 

It’s natural for parents to believe that trouble can be avoided by keeping their teenager always in sight, by fixing their every problem, and by generally keeping them under their control.  But I’ve learned that teens mature quicker when parents take steps in the early teen years to give up some of the control they have over their teen’s life. >> Article continued…

Embracing the Sinful Child

Parents across the country are faced every day with the challenge of older children who are living out choices that are far different from what the parents desired for them. The children don’t want to change, and are determined to continue along their chosen path.

Some may not understand the need for my encouragement to continue loving their offspring regardless of their actions, thinking it impossible to do anything else. But for others who are dealing with a rebellious and hateful older child, they know exactly what I am talking about. It’s all you can do to keep from ringing your child’s neck! >> Article continued…

Power Parenting

The most powerful thing you can do as a parent is to empower your teenager.

I’m grateful for the opportunity to help the parents of teenagers, whether through our residential program, through books, our blogs, seminars, or our two national radio programs.  >> Article continued…

A Confusing Culture for Teens and Parents

Most teenagers would love for their parents to get a taste of how confusing this culture is for them.  They face a difficult world and have to process an amazing amount of information and conflicting values every day.  They are overwhelmed on many levels. 

The cultural pressures teens face today are far worse than we faced when we were that age.  Any given day your teen may be exposed to pornography, perversion, immoral lifestyles, and encouraged by peers to participate in self-destructive behaviors.  They live in a raw culture where what is right, healthy, and nurturing is deemed to be all wrong and what is wrong is thought to be all right.

Teens need to fit in, no matter how bizarre this world has become. So the dilemma Christian parents face is how to train their children to maneuver through their culture without allowing it to control them or to either dilute or counter your spiritual beliefs. >> Article continued…

Teen Spin Control

Are you dealing with a struggling teen in your home?  Are emotions running high and hope running low?  I’d like to offer you some advice to help you find peace in the midst of this struggle.

There is nothing worse than living with a struggling teen who is spinning out of control, and no worse feeling than the hopelessness parents experience in the process.  It is difficult to know what to do and how to react when your teen daily reaches new lows in disobedience, dishonesty, and disrespect, and chooses every wrong thing. >> Article continued…

Your Teen’s Selfishness

What have you done today to help your teenager grow in maturity?

Some parents feed their teen’s selfishness into adult years by continuing to rotate their life around them.  I tell parents that at age 15 it is time for them to begin aggressively helping their teen get over a selfish mindset.

Instead of always wanting to be “served” by mom and dad, older teens need to do things for themselves and also learn to serve others.  After all, they are potentially only a few short years away from having to live totally unselfishly as parents themselves. >> Article continued…